"Who are you...who-who, who-who?"

Last Sunday, my techno-savvy friend Toby helped me out with a blog dilemma I was having. He is younger than I, and is part of a generation who came out of the womb with computer skills. He is always "up" on the latest and greatest on this gadget and that. I knew he would be the perfect person to solve my dilemma. Toby has a cool blog, much more advanced than my own. My blog is a Chevy....his blog is a Mercedes. Enough said.

After spending about 45 minutes with me on the phone, educating me on so many things I didn't know about my blog, he suggested that I put a counter on the bottom, just to see how many hits I am having. I kind of liked that idea. Sometimes when blogging, you feel like you are having a conversation with yourself, you know. Well, it has been exactly one week since he showed me how to put the counter on....and I have to tell you, I am floored!!!! At "press time," there have been 124 hits to my blog. Now some of these have been counted as times when I have looked at it or have posted something. But certainly not 124 times!! Which leads me to ask the question...."Who-who, who-who is looking at my blog? I really want to know." (Ever wondered why The Who would write a song called "Who are you?" It's kind of redundant, don't you think?)

I am kind of curious to know who my "blaudience" is. (That's blog terminology for "your readership," get it?) I have had several people share with me that they are enjoying my blog, and I had no idea they knew about it. So....I know some of you are scared to comment when you read my blog.....but why not throw "caution to the wind" and try it just this one time. Just simply "Tell me, who are you?" Come on....it will be fun.

The Light

"The Light was blinding. It penetrated deep into the dark recesses of our hearts, initially causing us to squint in pain, but then, as we relaxed and adjusted to the Light, it flooded us, delighted and changed us."- Nancy Ortberg, "Looking for God"

I read this quote over and over again this morning, as I reflected back on my own "Light bulb" moments with God, beginning some 17 years ago. And I have to use the word "moments" instead of "moment," because there are just too many light bulbs to count. Some dimmer switch types, some energy efficient, a few incandescent, and a scattering of "life changing" strobe lights have graciously emitted my path to God. The illumination has truly "flooded me, delighted me, and forever changed me." It has been worth everything to have been "blinded by the Light."

My favorite.....your favorite???

As the list narrows down on American Idol, I think I have finally arrived at my favorite contestant. Unlike past years, this season has so many I like... so many personalities I connect with...it was hard for me to pinpoint whom I would like to win Season 7. But after last week, I have decided. You may find this hard to believe, because you see me as some "top 40" kind of "chick." I never have been. The stereotype of the quintessential "30-something" female and her musical tastes is not me. Would you have guessed this one?

The Best Laid Plans......

Make big plans, but change your plans as time changes.--Marchant

Plans get you into things but you must work your way out.--Will Rogers

Life is what happens to you while you're busy making other plans.--John Lennon

"The Best Laid Plans" of the Hestermomma have been nothing more than just simple attempts at achieving a desired goal....and failing as of late. For some reason, my desired goal and God's desired goal haven't been in sinc lately. And as disappointed as I get when my "best laid plans" become "the worst laid plans," I take comfort in knowing that God is in control and that His plans always turn out for my good....somehow.

The girls and I set out Wednesday to spend a few days touring southwest Michigan with pending stops in St. Joseph, Paw Paw, and Battle Creek. These are all towns that "house" some of my dear ones, and I was so looking forward to seeing them all. Much to my husband's dismay, I characteristically try to cram every minute away seeing family members whom I miss so much. It is not that he doesn't want to share me.....he just feels that I overbook my schedule. And I do. I figure I will have plenty of time to recover from it when I get home. I just want to see everybody.

The ride up there was a breeze. My "pretty sneaky sis" always complains about the drive. But I have found it not to be that bad. Twenty minutes from our destination, Hopie says from the back seat, "It's hot in here." And as quickly as I adjusted the temp in the truck, I heard her yell, "I am going to be sick!" Before I could fully comprehend what was happening, she grabbed a nearby empty Target bag (gotta love Target!) and "deposited" her lunch from Subway and her dessert from DQ. At 70mph, I kept my hands at "10 and 2" and remained calm, cool, and collected.....but completely dumbfounded.

As descriptive as I naturally am, I won't go into the details of what happened next except to say that it happened again and again and again....so many times, I lost count. I could not subject the first stop of our Southwest Michigan tour to this illness, especially because it was my sister's house.... home of the absolutely precious niece "Izzy-B" and my equally adored nephew Michael. Nobody needs the flu, and that includes babies under the age of 11 months. So, Hopie and I checked into a nearby Holiday Inn Express (with a beautiful gray view of Lake Michigan) and spent the next two days held up there. We left Faith with the family as she seemed pretty bug-free.

I would have it no other way than to be by my baby's side when she was as sick as she was. Clearly, she felt as much disappointment as I did. She missed out on things she was really looking forward to as well.....like building forts out of blankets with her cousin Michael in the basement, playing with Izzy-B, eating Kellogg's pop-tarts for breakfast, etc. She kept telling me how sorry she was....which made me feel even worse about the situation. She would say, "I know how much you were looking forward to..." I couldn't argue with those words, but I did share this with her: "Even though you were so sick, I still had a great time with you. And I am really glad we got to spend some time together, just me and you."

In situations like these, you always think about what God might want you to learn from it. Obviously, He is showing me lately that I rely too much on "my plans" and don't look too hard for what "His plans" might be in the grand scheme of things. I am really trying to focus on looking at the God-good that comes out in all of my so-called "trials." There is always plenty of that to go around. I am after all, God's child. :)

PS- Hopie did a lot of sleeping in the hotel room. My sister was at her house taking care of the rest of the kids, while I handled the sick one. So...my amount of adult interaction was low....really low. When the maid came in to change the towels, I just about grabbed her and begged her to stay. I tried to ask her some questions to keep her engaged.... maybe explain to her why there was a strange smell in our room. (Remember, I told you I had lost count on Hopie's flu-capades.) I think her supervisor was nearby, otherwise, I could have talked her ear off. I even thought about asking her if she needed any help cleaning up in the next room. Seriously......

PPS-We never did make it to our other pending stops. Just couldn't subject anybody to this nasty flu bug. I was missing my family long before we made the trek there. It is strange to return home with that ache unaltered and still very present.

"Pretty Sneaky Sis"

You may remember me mentioning a few blogs back that my sister and I have our own language with each other consisting of quotes from movies, tv shows, toddler-isms of Faith's, and even commercials from "back in the day." I just stumbled upon this rare gem and dedicate this to my one and only sister, "Widdle." (Translation: She is little, I am bigger. Thus she has always been "Widdle" and I have always "Bigga." Any questions??) I know she will remember it well....because she's "pretty sneaky sis."

Attention Target Shoppers.....

Did you know that the Isaac Mizrahi line is leaving Target? I cannot say that I am sad about this. I try to stay as trendy as the next person....but I have only bought 1 IM piece the whole time he has been connected with the store. And that is because it was on the 75% off rack. Most of the time, he is just too "out there" for me. Maybe I didn't give him enough of a chance. Looks like I have until the end of 2008 to gain some affection for him. Hmmmm.....I wonder whom they will replace him with?

**Another Target blog you might enjoy looking at: target-addict.blogspot.com

Whew! That was a close one!

God is good! Have I said that lately?? I am so grateful for His insight....His timing. Case in point: Last night, Faith was having her first sleep over in her Daddy's newly finished basement. (This brings great joy to Gregg's heart, as this is the very reason he consistently labored in it for over 1 1/2 years.) With the new DVR, we are able to program the Hallmark Channel's Little House on the Prairie episodes that run twice a day. My girls are SO into Little House right now. It has been fun to revisit my childhood love for that show with them.

In trying to give Faith "her space," we told her that she could watch anything with her friend last night that was programmed, or that we already have on DVD. That seemed perfectly safe and harmless. As I was headed for bed, I thought I should just check on them one more time, to see if they needed anything. WAS I EVER GRATEFUL I DID!! It seems that yesterday's Little House on the Hallmark Channel was the 2 part episode all of us remember from watching it back in the 80's. Ask any avid watcher of the show back then, and they will surely be able to identify it in a heartbeat. To keep my blog free of words I absolutely hate, I will just say it had to do with Albert and a character named Sylvia. Enough said. It was the most scary, most disturbing one they ever did....even topping the show's finale with Walnut Grove exploding. I have never forgotten it.

So....I quickly explained to Faith why I wouldn't allow her to watch it. I didn't do a very good job because I hadn't planned on talking about this subject with her yet. It was totally off the cuff. Unfortunately, I will have to revisit it today, after her friend is gone. I am just not comfortable with how I left it.

Gregg, not at all a Little House watcher from the 80's, was quite taken back when I went upstairs to tell him what had just happened. He asked me "Why on earth would they have put something like that on a family show back then?" Maybe it was getting towards the end of the show and they were hungry for story lines. Honestly, I don't know. But I guess I should be grateful for the opportunity to talk with Faith about it in our home, instead of her learning about something so awful possibly at school.

**Side note: Attention girlfriends who remember the referred episode.....I could have used you last night!! I felt like I was having a hard time convincing her that this show wasn't something that she should be seeing. I even brought up a few of you by name as witnesses to that which I was trying to prove. Seemed to help some. I think she was having a hard time imagining something on the show being that scary for her to watch. She thought I might be exaggerating. Me? Naw....

Kind of Flaky??

This one makes me proud of my "Kellogg heritage." And it also prompts me to add a magnifying class on the napkin, next to the spoon, when my girls sit down to eat their frosted flakes. There could be a paid college education in this.

Fireproof Trailer

If you enjoyed the movie "Facing the Giants" a few years back, you'll be happy to know that Sherwood Pictures is coming out with a new movie called "Fireproof," coming to theaters in Fall 2008. I'll let the trailer speak for itself. If you grew up in the 80's, you might recognize a certain someone in the starring role.

This "bee" bad news for me and my girls

I just read an article in the Columbus Dispatch which informs the public that the bee population has survived the winter thus far in Ohio. It seems that 85% have endured the cold temps this winter, (do we humans have numbers like that?) which translates to about 1 billion bees. And this is a good thing? I know bees are essential for pollinating crops, flowers, and the like. But the only thing I really appreciate about them is their honey, Honey. This "bee" bad news for me and my girls. That means the amount of time the girls will enjoy playing in the backyard this summer will be minimal....especially when the clover comes in. The bees absolutely love that stuff. I can see it now. We have had this conversation before. It goes like this:

Setting: Inside the Hesterhouse...sometime in middle of June. Newness of summer break beginning to wear off. The "We have nothing to do" mentality already setting in.

Hestermomma: "You guys need to go outside. It is a beautiful day. Go out and enjoy it. No reason to be inside on a day like this."

Hestergirls: "We don't want to go outside. There are too many bees out there. Everywhere we go, we see bees."

Hestermomma: "Those bees don't care about you. They have too much to do. Mind your own business, and they'll mind theirs."

Hestergirls begrudgingly go outside. Few minutes later, crying ensues.

Hestermomma: with exasperation "What is wrong now?"

Hestergirls: "We were minding our own business and all of a sudden 'our business' became 'their business' and we got stung. Oooooooh, the agony."

Hestermomma feels like a candidate for "Worst Mother of the Year" and tries to make up for their stings with a trip to DQ. And with news like this about the bee population this year, looks like we will be seeing a lot of DQ this summer. Care to join me for a Dilly bar, anyone?

Beware of the Navy Blue Suit Coat- SKG Date #4

Today, Hopie and I went to the Columbus Art Museum for our 4th Secret Keeper Girl Date. While all dates are important with SKG, this date is key in the series as it concentrates on the reasons why it is essential to dress modestly. We had a wonderful time together and she handled the period pieces of art (especially European) very maturely, and I was proud of her for that. I remember when I did this date with Faith, it was a little uncomfortable for me to talk about all I needed to with her. I think I did a better job the second time around as I realize even more now how incredibly important it is to combat the world's messages about their purity and to focus on The Truth.

There was a peculiar thing about the Art Museum today. In every room, there is a chair set up in the corner, with an elderly man or woman, dressed in a navy blue suit coat sitting there...complete with walkie-talkie, of course. In my love for old people, I tried to converse with them, just saying "hello" as we walked to the next room. They sit there very stoically, as if they are also a piece of artwork in the room. They smile briefly, yet politely, and say nothing. I wonder if it is breaking official "Art Museum" etiquette to say "hi" to these people. I imagine them making a reach for the walkie-talkie and saying "Newbie alert in Gallery #4. You can't miss her. She will be the one foolishly saying "hello" to all navy blue suit coats sitting in the corner." I simply just wanted to acknowledge their presence there. I mean honestly, how exciting can that job be? I was just trying to spice it up for them a little. By Gallery #7, I was getting the message "loud and clear."

And the fun didn't stop there. I must have been really making a name for myself, and it wasn't for my artwork. I wanted to commemorate my date with Hopie by taking a few pictures of her near some artwork. Not by anything too famous like a Monet or a Warhol. Just by an unknown.....to me, that is. I had taken two pictures of her and was getting ready to take a third, when out of nowhere (I think the navy blue suit coats have secret panels in the museum that they slide in and out of to attack the perpetrator), I was confronted by a suit coat and told sternly, "No flash photography, mam." "I am so sorry," I sheepishly replied. My ultimate rule follower, Hope Elizabeth, was embarrassed and it was time to go home anyway. I could sense the Navy Blue Suitcoats' relief as we swiftly made our way to the parking lot. I am sure there was a formal announcement on the walkie talkies as we departed. "All art museum employees may now relax, and return to your assigned chair posts. She and her poor little innocent daughter are now gone." Whew!!! At least I made an exciting afternoon for them.

**How much do you want to bet that Hopie only remembers how her mother got in trouble at the Art Museum that day, and nothing about the information her mother was so concerned about communicating with her? I hope I am so wrong on this one.

"By His wounds, we are healed"

Easter week can be difficult for me at times when I think about the "weight" of the week and its events some 2000 years ago. The more I walk with God....the longer I walk with God, the more significance the week takes on. I feel such a burden for the fact that my sin....my daily sins....my hourly sins...my sins of the minute, have caused the Son of God, in all His Perfection, in all His Holiness, to die a brutal death on the Cross. And no matter how indebted I feel about this act, it won't change the fact that I will continue to sin on this side of heaven....for the rest of my earthly life.

Around this time of year, in casual conversation, we discuss the significance of this week's events with our girls. We talk about the Last Supper and the ways in which Jesus tried to spell out to the disciples what was going to happen to Him....why the evening was so important. We answer their questions about Good Friday, and why something so tragic, so unjust, would be called "good." Then after all the unconscionable darkness of that event, we share in the sheer beauty of the glorious 3rd day and why that day gives us a definite hope and a future.

I was talking with a friend of mine on the phone yesterday. She was sharing with me how introspective the events of this week make her feel as a Christ-follower. I was comforted to hear that, because I was feeling like I was focusing too much on the negative of Easter and not on The Gift I receive because of the death of Christ. She said that she felt it was important to feel "the weight" of this event in our lives as Christians. I think she is right. I liken it to the awareness and appreciation you feel towards your parents, when you realize all they did and sacrificed to help make you the person you are today. And just as your parents don't expect any "payment" in return for what they did, they only desire your love.....I see that as similar to how Christ feels about the sacrifice. I believe His Unending Love would move Him to do it again and again.

Isaiah 53:5 But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.

In defense of "Joe Cool"

While I may have been a little hard on Joe Cool yesterday, I must admit that sometimes (Ohhh! This is so hard to admit!) there may be a Wife #1, Wife #2, and on really horrible days, a Wife #3 at the Hesterhouse. Wife #1 is the sweet, adoring, kind-hearted, submissive wife to Husband #1. Her goal is to meet the needs of her family with a smile on her face, Proverbs 31 emulating from her, with perfect hair, perfect outfits, and perfect fingernails (no chipped polish, please). Wife #1 tries to be around for 4 weeks out of the month, but gets the boot when she is unwillingly replaced for one week by Wife #2.

Wife #2 doesn't want to be here, and would much rather be on a sunny beach in Florida. Her weekly visit to the Hesterhome is filled with short tempered responses, sprinkled with heavy doses of a complaining spirit. She can be driven to tears at less than a moment's notice, and makes her family wonder what in the world happened to Wife #1. After her week stay, she quickly departs out the back door, and Wife #1 comes sauntering back in just as if she was never away. She can't understand why everyone is hiding under the beds, shaking with fear, and looking at her like she has three heads as she makes her grand entrance. The relief on their faces at seeing Wife #1 back in her original form could drive Wife #1 to tears. But tears are usually saved for Wife #2, when she is in the picture. The family welcomes Wife #1 with open arms and squeezes her extra tight, hoping to remove any traces of Wife #2 from her body.

Wife #3 will not be described in words, because she is just too terrifying to characterize. She VERY RARELY shows up. There have only been a couple of times in 17 years that Wife #2 has been on vacation, and Wife #3 comes in to sub for her. I think that is when Husband #2 shows up. Husband #1 is just too sweet to take on something as volatile as #3.

So, as much as I struggle at times with Joe Cool on the phone, I know honestly that I have no room to talk whatsoever when it comes to being married to "multiple" spouses. This, of course, is Wife #1 speaking. Was there any doubt?

Connecting with "Joe Cool"

I hope this would not classify as polygamy, but I have been married to two men for 17 years. I really only want to be married to one of them. But sometimes when Husband #1 calls from work, Husband #2 grabs the phone away from him and starts talking in this lower, much deeper voice, dripping with tones of "I am too macho to be talking to my wife, because there are too many other pilots around me" all over it. Over the years, I have admonished Husband #2 (appropriately known as "Joe Cool") when he gets on the phone because he is NOT the person I want to talk to. I want to hear Husband #1's sweet voice on the phone, telling me how much he loves me, how much he misses me, and how he can't wait to get home to see his "beautiful" wife. Instead, I get Tom Cruise mixed with a little "Goose" on the side. And I hate to break the news to you, Joe, but the glory days of "Top Gun" are so over and so are the Ray Bans!! You, #2 , have "lost that lovin feelin" and I really want you to go away. But alas, if you have been here for 17 years, you will probably be here for another 17 more.

The nice thing about Joe Cool is he never comes into the Hesterhouse. I have never seen him with my own eyes. He is a coward. He is only willing to talk to me on the phone. He is never willing to show his face. And now I must ask, how macho is that? Now hear this, Joe! I want my husband back!! Do you hear me??? Quit grabbing the phone from him while he is at work! Let the "sweet nothings" flow. Oh, how I can hear them now....."nothing...nothing....nothing." How sweet the sound!

Remotely speaking.....

This morning, while Gregg was at work (Hee! Hee! Hee!) and before church started, I "twinked" around with the DVR remote and programmed the following for this week:

Little House on the Prairie
Life Today with James and Betty Robison
Decorating Cents (new episodes only)
Martha Stewart Living (Suggested by a friend....thanks, Katherine!)
Myles of Style (new show on HGTV)

and that is just a start!!

I know I won't watch all of these. It kind of reminds me of how many podcasts I have subscribed to since we got the ipod. I have every intention of listening to them, but I am so behind now, I feel guilty. MAN! I have issues!!

Hesterfamily hears a Horton

Yesterday, we took the girls to see "Horton hears a Who." It kind of surprised me how much they wanted to see it....being 10 and 12, you know. But they still love cartoons, and I can't say that bothers me a bit. In all the recent sightings we have had that the teenage years are staring us squarely in the face, it was comforting to know cartoons and "G" rated movies still score big with our girls. I don't have a problem with that at all. I am savoring every "kid" moment I have left.

After the movie, which was worth seeing by the way, we headed over to Barnes and Noble, so Hopie could use her gift card. Barnes and Noble has so many things that are tempting to me. I love their cool bookmarks, unusual stationary, and of course, their books abound. It didn't take long for Hopie to pick out two Nancy Drew books to add to her collection. We decided to do something completely out of the ordinary for the Hesterfamily, and grab a few trendy drinks from the in-store Starbucks, strategically placed by the magazine section. These drinks cost almost as much as our movie tickets did. Of course, they aren't expecting a family of 4 to sit and sip on Starbucks in their little cafe', so we had a hard time finding a place for all of us to sit. We split up...2 and 2...and watched our girls giggle, share in conversation, and slurp every last drop of their over-priced drink, at a nearby table. They looked so much like little young women sitting at that round table...purses placed on top, with their legs crossed, flipping their hair to their shoulders as to ensure it wouldn't get wrapped around their straws. For a moment, I envisioned what it will be like for them to enjoy their relationship (currently "not-so-treasured") as adult women and how important little "Starbucks outings" will be to them in their future. While it pained us a little to think of them that way, it also brought joy to Gregg and I in knowing that they will always be one another's "special presents."

**When the girls were little, I would always tell them how they were each other's "special presents." This became good terminology to use when they began their season of sisterly spats, and needed to be reminded of their value to one another. Has it worked 100% of the time? NO! But I think they will 100% "get it" one of these days.

This is.......American Idol....with a DVR!!

So....we can't get a Wii. We are coming to terms with it, and we are about to give up. But we CAN get a DVR, and that is what we did. It felt good to have some control over something technological with our TV for a change. Last night, we watched the results of AI in about 30 minutes at the very most. We skipped through the bottom 3 re-singing their songs from the night before (not going to endure that again), all the commercials (hallelujah!), and the new "call in your ridiculous question" segment of the show. We even skipped through Katherine McPhee's rendition of "Something." (It is from my fav Beatle Album "Abbey Road"...but she is not my fav singer.)

Although we are very new to this whole thing, I think it is going to be great not to have to watch a single thing on TV that we don't want to, including commercials. If I understand this right, we could watch old tv shows like "The Waltons" til "the cows come home" and never have to watch anything current again. We could create our own "TV LAND" here at home without all the trashy reality shows like High School Reunion.....the BIG 4-0, etc. I am liking this already. I don't think I could ever tire of hearing "Goodnight, John Boy."

Parenting in a different kind of darkness

Last week, I talked about my concern about parenting in the dark (i.e. Mistakenly thinking your child is a moral, kind-hearted, upstanding young person, while everyone else around them is clearly aware of a major flaw in their character, etc., etc.). While this is still on the forefront of my mind, I have also been thinking about the darkness of the world, and how unbelievably different my girls' teenage years will be than my own, in terms of the things they have to face head on. Sure, they will have the general adolescent temptations I encountered.... their grandma encountered.... and probably their great-grandma encountered, such as disrespectful behaviors toward parents, defying authority, experimenting with demonstrations of independence, making decisions that you might regret in the future,etc. But the world seems so much darker now. Today, with any form of media, the kind of messages our kids are receiving about themselves and their bodies is so incredibly disturbing to me. And honestly, I would really like to stay "in the dark" on this one. The task in which to fight those temptations seems so grand, and I don't feel confident in my abilities to handle it. I want to run away from it all, because I can't handle the ramifications of my parenting if I "do it wrong."

Just a few days ago, a study was published that stated "one in 4 girls has a sexually transmitted disease." I thought of all the teenage girls I know. I went through a mental list of them, and every fourth one I labeled with a STD, just so I could get a stronger visual of what this stat is really saying. Absolutely mindboggling!!! And on a side note....because I am having to take "Valtrex" for my shingles (used to treat some STDs as well), I have wondered what it would be like to have to take this stuff for the rest of your life. The commercials make it sound like no big deal. BUT IT IS A BIG DEAL! WHY DOESN'T THE WORLD CARE ABOUT A STATISTIC LIKE THIS???

I try to be proactive with my girls regarding the difficult conversations of life (i.e their purity, etc.) but I have no guarantee that all of these efforts will yield what I am praying for....a clear understanding of why God wants them to wait to give "the gift" away until marriage. Sites like http://virtuealert.blogspot.com/ and books like "What your daughter isn't telling you" by Susie Shellenberger scare me. But I as much as I desire to live in the dark on this stuff, I just can't. Keeping my head in the sand is not going to benefit my girls, or our relationship in the long run. So, I look at these sites....I read these kind of books...and in sharing with others, probably annoy moms around me who, just like me, would love to keep their heads in the sand, too.

The up side of all of this is how wonderful it would be to have a group of moms hitting these subjects hard with their teens and preteens.....not beating them over the head with it, but having a constant drum beat of "purity" playing in the background of their lives. What do you think? Who's with me? Man, this parenting thing takes a lot of work to do it right. And even after all that work, there is no guarantee. But wait a minute, maybe there is......

Train up a child in the way she should go, and when she is old, she will not depart from it. Proverbs 22:6

Will you join me in praying for our children's hearts as they encounter deeper temptations in their teen years? Are you feeling the burden of this too?

I have shingles...and I don't mean on my roof!

Right before Gregg left for Florida last week, I told him my skin really hurt right below my armpit. I had him look at it, as I was sure he would see a rash, or at the very least, some rough skin. He said he saw absolutely nothing....so I decided to just treat it with some lotion, hoping that would ease the pain. Throughout the week, the pain never changed and the lotion didn't seem to help at all. Every time I rolled over in my sleep, I could feel the pain in that particular area. But I was stumped as to what it was, and thought for sure that it would be feeling better soon.

Over the weekend, I told my mom and my sister about it and asked them to look at the area too. I was in need of a second and third opinion. They concurred with Gregg's "there is nothing really there" diagnosis, but my mom did mention the word "shingles" in passing.

I decided to stop complaining about it and go see the doctor today. After describing to him that I feel like I have a sunburn just below my armpit, he looked at the area, and said, "I am pretty sure you have shingles. Wow!! That was a shocker! I tried to think of all the necessary questions I should be asking him, but they weren't coming as quickly as I hoped.

The internet sites have a lot of information about shingles, but most of them have pictures of older people on them....leading me to believe that I have an "senior" virus. And to add even more "spice" to our lives, we just learned that a water main broke down the road and we could be without water for the next two days. That would have made things really interesting if that had happened while our company was here. Lots of fun right now at the Hesterhome! God is still good!

Blizzard of '08- Part 6

This was the sun setting on a wonderful weekend!

Blizzard of '08-Part 5

They could have done this all day long...with no breaks! They just had so much fun!

Blizzard of '08- Part 4

Cousins sliding down the Hesterhill!!

Blizzard of '08- Part 3

This is the face I have been watching all weekend! Absolutely precious!

Blizzard of '08- Part 2

The first of several meals/games around the table this weekend.

Blizzard of '08-Part 1

This is our back deck....18 inches of snow!

Disappointment replaced by elation!

Who says crying doesn't help you get your way.....even at 39? I hope this isn't the reason my family decided to BRAVE the elements, and come down here to see us on Friday. But I sure am glad they did!! After much prayer and watching hours of predictions on the Weather Channel, they courageously ventured from MI to OH right before we were BLASTED by the "biggest snow of the Century." (Personally, I find this hard to believe...."biggest snow"....It has been pretty unreal...but "biggest snow?")



This weekend has been such a gift from God! We have been "holed up" in our house for about 39 hours and it has been absolutely wonderful.....because we have done nothing but just be with one another. Here is just a sampling of the "nothing" we did together:



1) Hours of sledding (Slip sliding away)

2) Hours of plowing the driveway (thanks G'pa Dan!!)

3) Hours of movie watching like "Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium"

4) Hours of HGTV and TLC (Favorites like "House Hunters" and "What not to wear")

5) Hours of Apples to Apples (I won...which makes it even better! :) )

6) Hours of watching my adorable niece Isabelle play (for some reason, I could do this all day)



My sister and I had a bad hankerin' for Target this morning...and because church was cancelled, we felt like we needed to use our time "wisely." So, we thought it would be best to take the highway, just to ensure our safety, and even found that to be scary at times. (It was worth it though, because we found countless orange clearance stickers waiting for us.) Come to think of it, Ohio just isn't used to this kind of snow....and maybe they don't plow like they should. Or maybe it just came down too fast. Shouldn't fault the snow plows.



The only downfall of the weekend has been the absence of Gregg, who finally got home this afternoon. He got stuck in Florida with the Guard and wasn't able to fly in because of our weather. Tough break! But it really would have been even more fun if he had been here.



I am grateful for the effort my family made this weekend. It makes you feel very loved. I feel even more loved by my Father....because He always knows what you need, when you need it. All throughout this weekend, even in the midst of all this snow, I have felt very loved by God. He blessed me with the weekend of making precious memories with my family. As my mom would say, "We will always remember the Blizzard of '08." That we will.

Idol Buzz

Next week....their first week of Finals on American Idol.....will be "Lennon/McCartney week!!"
Now that's something I'm NOT disappointed about!!

A Display of Disappointment

dis·ap·point·ment /ˌdɪsəˈpɔɪntmənt/ –noun
1.
the act or fact of disappointing: All of his efforts only led to the disappointment of his supporters.
2.
the state or feeling of being disappointed: Her disappointment was very great when her family couldn't come for a visit.
3.
a person or thing that disappoints: The play was a disappointment.

Is it ok to display disappointment in front of your kids? Is it ok for them to see you emotional....especially when it has nothing to do with them? This morning, I did just that.....and as much as I mentally tried to gain control of my emotions (i.e. conversation in my head of "Don't do this....don't do this), I couldn't keep it contained and the flood gate of tears opened. We were on our way to school when I received a call from my mom with the news that they would not be able to come down this weekend due to a winter storm we have coming in tomorrow. I have been so busy getting prepared for their visit, in addition to single parenting this week, that I haven't kept a close eye on the weather. And it wouldn't matter if I did, because this is Central Ohio, and we never seem to get exactly what they are forecasting.

I have been battling with the "distance factor" lately. I am the only one in my extended family who doesn't live in Michigan. There has been a lot going on within my family recently, and I have deeply wished I could be there to love on them and give them encouragement. Even though we are just over four hours away, the day to day needs I cannot help with, and I struggle with how to show I care about their circumstances this far away. So, I was looking forward to serving my family in some capacity here in my home this weekend. I was anticipating making memories with them here, at our house, which doesn't get to happen very often. And as if my disdain for winter wasn't enough (see last post), now Winter has one final say in whether my family can risk the trip here or not.....which I do not want them to do.

As I returned home from dropping the girls off at school, I drove the whole way home without the radio on (rare for me), just processing the news and my display of disappointment in front of my girls. Before dropping them off, Faith kept rubbing my hand in the van saying, "It's ok, Momma, you will see them again soon. We can go up for Spring Break." I appreciate her consolation, but I don't want her to feel responsible for my happiness. Do I want my girls to see my humanness? Yes...and no. They saw it today.....and I hope it doesn't taint their view of me and the woman in which I strive to be.

"Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore"

Usually, I get really depressed in the winter. The absence of sunshine just zaps the joy out of me (not spiritual joy, mind you....just earthly joy.) I truly dread Fall, even in all its splendor and vibrant colors....because I know Winter is just around the corner, and Winter can just plain scare me. When I knew we were returning to the North some 7 years ago, I honestly "fretted" about having to deal with winter the rest of my life. I had so enjoyed being without it for roughly the first 10 years of our marriage.

This year has been different for some reason, and I am relieved. I have actually made it through the winter without much incident. I have enjoyed snow days with my girls, the smell of hot chocolate in the house, and the presence of a warm blanket being wrapped around me. I have been absolutely amazed that my usual winter disposition did not envelop me this year. The cold, gray months have literally flown by.

My exhaustion of winter seemed to be way off in the distance until this past Monday when Spring decided to ask us all the rhetorical question of "Remember me?" Our temps were in the low 70's .....the sun was out....every one's step seemed to be just a little lighter that day. AND THEN TUESDAY CAME! Cold temps, rain, rain, and more rain....then rain turning to freezing rain. Then SNOW! When I woke up this morning and looked out, I realized the emotion I had been successfully suppressing the last 3 months was no longer willing to hide her ugly head. And in the words of REO Speedwagon, "Baby, I can't fight this feeling anymore." I NEED SPRING!! I NEED IT DESPERATELY!! I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! I DON'T CARE HOW PRETTY IT IS OUT MY WINDOW! I NEED SPRING, AND I NEED IT NOW!

PS- God, I know that you don't like me demanding things on my blog....especially when I write it in all CAPS. And I know You like to drag winter out a little bit, just so I really appreciate Spring when it comes. But could I have a little sampling of Spring again....really soon? Pretty please?

PPS- Honey, if you are reading this and you come home with a tan.....life is going to be rough for YOU!!! I love you, but I'm just "keepin' it real."

Parenting in the Dark

I have found the best heartfelt conversations I have with my husband are in the early hours of the morning....before the day starts, before the girls are up, and before my mind has been cluttered with the busyness of the day. Recently, our early morning discussions have been centered around our concern of "parenting in the dark" (Definition: Mistakenly thinking your child is a moral, kind-hearted, upstanding young person, while everyone else around them is clearly aware of a major flaw in their character....the kind of flaw that makes them difficult to get along with, etc.) We love our babies....and we try really hard to "train them up in the way they should go" but sometimes we wonder what other eyes (teachers, friends, people we are "living life" with) are seeing in our girls that we may be missing along the way.

I am in the process of asking some friends if I can borrow their eyes for a few years. I am not asking them to bear the responsibility of raising my girls....that's my job. But I am giving them complete freedom to come to me when they see something that causes them alarm. Because if it causes red flags in their minds, I am pretty sure it is going to in mine as well. The more eyes, the better. I think it is really important to have other adults-besides your parents- that you feel accountable to in some way. This is what I am praying for.

It is not easy to hear of behavior in your children that isn't making your parental radar screen. But awareness trumps parental pride. Parenting in the dark has long term ramifications I am not comfortable with. Give me a spot light and some extra 20/20....and I will be grateful. In the long run, I know my girls will be too.

Sleeping soundly at night......

Well, my mascara worries are now over! Finally, I can sleep soundly! Now, you can sleep soundly too. I know you have been concerned about this for me. :) But I want you to know that a friend recommended "Lash Blast" to me by Cover Girl (thanks, Brenda!), and so far, long lashes abound!! Today is my first day of trying it out. Sometimes, it takes a little while for a new mascara to perform. It seems my eyelashes have to get accustomed to something new, as if the mascara must prove itself first before they are willing to cooperate. Anyway, if you are burdened by short, stubby lashes, give it a try. If it doesn't work well for you, there is always "Hottie" brand, as my friend Toby suggested.....but I couldn't find it anywhere. :)

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One sock, two socks. Red sock, blue sock!

Monday is laundry day and "put the house back together after the weekend hurricane" day at the Hesterhome. I told Hopie not to make her bed this morning because I needed to change the sheets on her bed. She was thrilled! Not have to make her bed? A great way to start her week!!

I have always wondered where all the missing socks go in the world. Unjustly, I have accused our washing machine time and time again of eating our socks. Our washing machine just sits there silently and takes it....never defending herself. Well, I now know where all the missing socks have gone in our house....maybe even in your house as well. The culprit has been found!! It is at the bottom of Hopie's bed!!!!! I was so taken back by what I saw when I lifted up her sheet, I had to take a picture. I was speechless. I think you can see why.

Now, humbly, I must go before our 15 year old washing machine....who has been so good to us and apologize. I am pretty confident she has never swallowed one of our socks, like I have so frequently charged her with. Thankfully, she is not one to hold grudges.

If today, by chance you are folding laundry and find that you are missing a sock or two, feel free to shoot me an email. I think I may know where it is.